Thursday, March 29, 2012

Laundry and a follow up on criticizing mother Teresa


So, laundry in Rwanda is not for the faint of heart. Or hands, apparently. Even though I have helpers who do my laundry for me (ugh, that sounds disgustingly privileged. Which it is :/ ), I wanted to be able to do it myself. So two Thursdays ago, my helper Bibianne showed me how to wash my clothes by hand like she does. What this basically amounts to is separating your clothes by underwear, shirts, skirts, pants, dresses, and sweaters, filling a wide and shallow bucket with water, adding powdered laundry detergent, mixing that up and getting it all sudsy, adding your clothes and letting them soak, scrubbing them with a bar of soap and then back and forth with your hands, putting them in another bucket of sudsy water, scrubbing them again (no soap this time), putting them in a bucket of clean water, and then squeezing them out before hanging them up on the line to dry. Long and laborious work to be sure. And a little taxing on your hands. The first Thursday I did this, my hands were a little raw by the end, especially my cuticles and skin below them. The second Thursday I did this, my fingers had apparently not healed enough since the first time, and by the time I was halfway through with my underwear, one of my cuticles was bleeding pretty badly. My hands are lazy, as Bibianne put it. I’ll have to whip them into shape before we live on our own in May!

And the follow up. So, many of the criticisms I found of the Missionaries of Charity homes in India are not evident in the home here in Kigali. Granted, I think some things could be improved, but by Rwandan standards, conditions are pretty good. The children are fed good food, they receive physical therapy if they need it, they have toys, they get medicine when they’re sick, they have a stocked medicine cabinet, they have well-kept records of each of the children, they weigh them, they have a doctor who comes to care for the children, they respond when volunteers have a concern (they had the doctor look at a boy when he had a large, soft, oddly shaped bump on his head that I brought to their attention), they know everyone’s names, etc. The only thing I can’t see here is the financial side of things, but I am only a volunteer. The sisters did mention spending a ton of money (I think she said a million) on leg braces for the children, but that’s about all I’ve heard. Again, by Rwandan standards, the place is in good condition. All I know is that the Vatican controls all of the Missionaries of Charity’s funds, so who knows what the story is for the order as a whole, but as for this home, things look pretty good. 

Spring Breekend!!!


So, spring break doesn’t actually exist here. You have no idea how jealous I am of those of you who actually had it. We don’t have any scheduled breaks here, so two Fridays ago, we made our own. After work, we all packed up our bags and headed to the beach!! Katy and Ben caught an early bus, while Alissa and I caught a bus Friday night. Tameshia flew out the next day :P Alissa and I met in the Nyabugogo bus park and we’re lucky to catch the last bus to Gisenyi that night! The bus park is immensely crowded and busy. There were beggars, hockers, vendors, mtn guys, people trying to get you on their buses, motos, storefronts, and an endless maze of buses. The bus ride took about 3 hours, and it was dark the entire way, so we couldn’t see a thing. We got to Gisenyi and took motos almost all the way to our hotel as the drivers clearly had no idea where they were going even though they said they did. We got to one hotel and asked for directions, though they had no idea where our hotel was either. Disappointed, we went back out to our motos, tried to explain to them that no, we were not going to Bethany guest house in Kibuye. We were staying here in Gisenyi. Then out of nowhere, the Americans arrived! As Alissa put it, clearly Americans are saviors. They gave us skittles, showed us the glow of the volcano in the distance, and walked us to our hotel. Paying the motos was fun as well. As usually happens when you’re talking to moto drivers, a whole swarm of them descended on us. By the time we had to pay them, we had forgotten which ones had driven us, and they were all asking for money! We just gave it to our best guess knowing that they knew the truth and they could fight over it themselves.

The next day was beach day! We had a great breakfast, met up with Tameshia, and headed down to Lake Kivu!! Of course getting pictures with the “DRC border in .3 Km” sign in good tourist fashion :P We first walked out on a jetty of rocks that was really pretty and just enjoyed the lake! It was huge! Not quite as big as America’s great lakes, but much bigger than any other lake I’ve seen. Next, we walked down the road toward the Serena Hotel—this super fancy hotel that had a gorgeous pool and a private beach. This would probably be a good time to mention that this trip was for Ben’s birthday and was largely subsidized by his parents. Alissa and I went for a dip in the lake (not sure if we were supposed to do that or not, but oh well) and then came back onshore to relax :) Somewhere between the high elevation, the lake reflection, and the equatorial sun, I was burned in no time. Almost two weeks later, I’m still peeling. The food there was ridiculously expensive and not that great, but oh well. Vacation. It was also fairly awkward that our beach was almost entirely made up of white people while the beach a little further down was entirely made up of black people with a rope and a guard separating the two. That was pretty awkward, and I was fairly uncomfortable being at such a nice hotel, but I guess it was only for one day? Whatever helps me sleep at night :/ Anyway, once we got bored, we walked down the road into town to go to the market. We had heard it was a lot bigger and more interesting, but it turned out to be fairly run of the mill. It was still interesting though. Between dresses, skirts, and a hijab (for me :P), we made out pretty well. We ended up walking back to our hotel in the rain and only after the hour plus trek did we find out that town and the market were only a 15 minute walk from our hotel. We took the extremely long way. But we finished off the night with some amazing pizza and a good night’s sleep on the most comfortable beds!

The next morning, we headed back to the lake, but this time, we wanted to find a boat that could take us out for a ride. We found some local fishermen and paid them about 10,000 francs to take us out around this little island and to go see the hot springs! The area is fairly volcanic with a few volcanoes in the area and…some sort of gas trapped at the bottom of the lake. The hot springs were awesome. We felt super touristy as we drove up while people were bathing and just hanging out. But some other muzungus were there right before us, so I’m guessing they’re used to it. And the water was piping hot! If I could bathe there every day, I totally would. After the boat ride, we stopped by this one restaurant where you could pick out your own fish from a lady selling it on the street and have the restaurant cook it for you. I opted out of this one, of course, and instead feasted on chips (fries), primus, and sugar cane (which made my jaw ache! You have to peel away the bark with your teeth and break off chunks of super fibrous pulp to chew and suck the juice out of. Tough work for some sugar water! But it was good). We nearly missed the bus again in the afternoon. Apparently Sunday evening is rush hour for people heading back into Kigali. But we made it back just fine and got to enjoy some beautiful scenery along the way!

Birthday Party and Rwandan Time


So a few weeks ago, it was my sister Yvonne’s birthday. I don’t know if birthdays were traditionally a big thing in Rwanda, but it was definitely a special night in my family. We all gathered in the living room and had our pick of Fanta (no special occasion is complete without Fanta :P). My mom then stood up and gave a speech about how Yvonne was her third born, when she was born, and some other things (it was in Kinyarwanda). Then all the siblings got up and gave a little speech to Yvonne wishing her a happy birthday, me included :P Then my dad got up and did the same. I think his was in English. This family can code switch like no other. Then it was cake time! Yvonne blew all the candles out after we sang happy birthday to her, and then she had to relight them and do it all over because our dad was out of the room. I’m pretty sure we ended up singing happy birthday about 5 times that night both in English and French like it was no big deal. Then my sister Fabiola helped her cut the cake before we each took a piece. After eating, Yvonne got up and gave her own speech thanking us, God, etc. and expressing wishes for the future. And then she started dancing :) Then it was gift time! Gifts apparently aren’t as big of a deal here as they are in America. My mom got her…I think it was maybe chips or something? It might have been from the whole family. I got her a chocolate bar and perfume, which, I didn’t mean to one up anybody, but no one really seemed to mind, so it was fine. Then it was dinner time! Birthdays at my house mean ketchup and mayo, which is a big deal. My dad says he doesn’t buy those often because he doesn’t want the kids to get fat, yet he tells me all the time that he wants me to grow fat. Whatever :P Great night though! I hardly ever get to see my whole family together (my whole family meaning those who live at home), so that was nice.

And now for the frustrating phenomenon known as Rwandan time. And this is backtracking a bit. Right when we got home from the wedding, my sister came in to ask me if I wanted to go visit their aunt right then. I said sure, but asked if I needed to change back into my wedding clothes. She said yes, but hurry. So to my American mind, that meant get your ass upstairs, throw on the easiest, nicest outfit, and get to the car in less than a minute because mom is leaving now. So naturally after doing so, I ended up sitting in the car for about 15 minutes waiting for everyone else to meander out to the car. After all 8 of us crammed into the car, we left. It was starting to get dark, but they didn’t seem to mind. We got about 10 minutes away from the house, and then my dad stopped along the side of the road to talk to someone for a while. We then proceeded to pull into the parking lot of a group of stores where my dad informed us that it was now too late to go to Nyamata and that we would go tomorrow after church. Frustrated American was frustrated. So we sat in the parking lot for a while as some of my siblings and my parents went in to buy snacks for us. At least I got popcorn, chips (crisips, as my 7 year old sister says), and passion fruit juice out of the whole ordeal. My 7 year old sister, Peace, and I went to English church the next day. It was great because I actually understood what was going on and the sermon actually didn’t piss me off (like I was fearing it would), but it was soooooo American. After Rwandan church (small benches with no backs, big choirs, Kinyarwanda hymns, babies everywhere, and no white people), this was quite a shock. After that, we came home, ate lunch, then proceeded to wait 2 hours until we were supposed to leave for Nyamata. At 4, my sister came in to say that we were leaving right then. So again, my American mind tells me to get up, grab my stuff, lock my room, and go wait by the stairs. A while later, my mom comes out and decides we need to eat peanuts and drink juice before we can leave. So we do so. And then just as we finish eating, my aunt decides that it’s too late for us to come. We’ll come some other time. ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! I never realized how much I love schedules, definite (hell, even approximate) plans, etc. until now.

Moral of the story: Asking what time something is going to happen just doesn’t make sense here. Gotcha. 

A Traditional Rwandan Wedding


So, a few weekends back, my mom invited me to go to her brother’s wedding. The wedding, she said, started at 1, so naturally we left at 1, got to the wedding, milled around for a bit, waited in the car, then finally went in and sat down. The wedding started at 3. It was a traditional wedding, but parts of it had definitely been modernized—for instance, right next to the traditional peace basket on both the bride and groom’s sides, there was a tray of Fanta and bottled water. We sat on the groom’s side right behind the front row which was entirely composed of men (I guess men from the family), and in particular, we were right behind the spokesman for the family. Across the yard (as this took place at someone’s house) was the bride’s side with the same set up (and a very grumpy looking spokesman. Nice guy, but terrifying default face). In between the two and at the front was the bride and groom’s…place to sit. I’m not entirely sure what to call it. Anyway, the wedding was basically a drama played out between the two spokesmen that negotiated the wedding. It was all in Kinyarwanda, so my sister had to translate for me—a duty she gets tired of doing :P The ceremony began with the spokesman from the groom’s side forming a relationship with the spokesman of the other side, bringing gifts of wine,  etc. Next, the groom’s side spokesman says that his family has a boy that is interested in one of their girls. Then the bride’s side spokesman dances around giving her away by going through other women in the family—“but this one, she is so old” and “she is my wife! How dare you try to take her from me!”—before finally admitting that the bride is there. Then they negotiate a bride price of 8 cows before a group of men dressed in traditional clothes in interesting patterns on top of western formal wear goes out to inspect the cows. They come back to report on the quality of the cows, some young boy comes out and talks about how beautiful Rwandan women are (dancing to imitate them of course), and then the two sides finally agree to the wedding. The groom came out followed by the bride who was preceded by who I’ll assume were the bridesmaids doing a traditional dance. The bride was absolutely gorgeous!!! She wore a blue sari with silver trim (not exactly traditional, but gorgeous nonetheless) and kept a very straight face the entire time in keeping with Rwanda’s emotionally reserved tradition. There was so much music, drumming, and dancing as she came out—it was awesome! The drumming and music were a recording though, but still. The groom put a ring on the bride’s finger, the two exchanged several gifts, and then they went to greet each of the families before taking their seats up front. When the bride came to our side, she gave her new father-in-law a leather cowboy hat and a beaded cane, which I guess is basically saying, “Congrats! You’re an old man now!” Leather cowboy hats are fairly common among old men here. Then the spokesmen exchanged a few more pleasantries before the bride and groom processed out and the ceremony finished.

It was a pretty cool experience! A little boring at times with all the back and forth and wine exchanging, but I’m definitely glad I got to be a part of that. There’s also a church wedding, though I’m not entirely sure what that consists of. Maybe I’ll get to attend one of those too!

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Oh yeah, I have a blog


So, sorry it’s been so long since I last updated. The long of the short of it is I’ve been doing a lot of the same stuff, which I expected would happen once I started my internship. I go to the orphanage Monday through Saturday except for Thursdays. I get there at 8 am either by bus and foot or by moto (shhhhh, we’re not supposed to take those) when I’m running late and I’m greeted by a bunch of kids either running up to me, jumping up and down from afar, making some sort of “uhhhhh-UHHH” sound, which I know is meant to get my attention, or smiling :) Anddd it usually smells like a few diapers need to be changed, so I usually get to work on that or feeding them or putting on their leg braces. Here’s a quick profile on some of the kids:

There’s this one kid, Muhire, who is so smart but hates not getting his way. He has cerebral palsy, but his mind is perfectly fine. He can’t speak very well, but he can say oya and yego (yes and no) pretty clearly, and he’ll also raise his eyebrows to say yes (like everyone else here) and shake his head to say no. The second I get there, he starts asking me to take him outside to the playground. He loves to go on the merry go round, and he loves even more for me to take him on the slide and the swings. He’s about 7 though, I think, so he’s a big guy to lug all the way up the slide. And then once I do that for him, alllllll the other kids with cerebral palsy want to go too :P They only get one turn on each before I have to rest for a bit. But if I ever tell this kid no, lord help me. It’s meltdown time. I try to help him get around and help him do what he wants as much as I can, but there are about 15 other kids there vying for my attention as well, which he summarily disapproves of. He needs to learn that he can’t always get his way, but it’s so hard since most of the things he asks for, the other able-bodied kids could do without a second thought. One of the others vying for my attention is Teresa, and Muhire’s quite alright with me helping her. They’re best friends.   

Teresa also has cerebral palsy but is completely mentally fine. She’s….maybe four or five? She’s smaller than Muhire and slightly more physically able as well. And I’ve gotten to see them both graduate from having someone feed them to feeding themselves! Well, almost. Teresa is still working on that one. And she absolutely must stay clean while she’s eating. And she loves my sunglasses and the random headband that’s been floating around :) Pink and skirts—especially when put together—are her favorite, and she has the most adorable smile! And she wants to potty train—that’s right, WANTS to. Even though most of the time she asks to go, I think she just does it for attention :P She and Muhire are best buds—probably because they understand that they’re in the same situation physically and mentally. They always look out for each other (and others too!) and make sure that the other is ok or will tell me to get something if the other needs it (even at the expense of me playing with them). They’re great :) And I know they would do SO much better in families, especially ones who could give them proper treatment and education. God, they would thrive.
There’s this other guy, Jeff or Joseph—I hear him get called both, but I think it’s Jeff. He has cerebal palsy, is deafblind (with a residual amount of each sense), is mentally challenged, and has epilepsy. I have no idea what happened to this kid, because it seems so unlikely that he would simply be born with all of these. Maybe some sort of disease. Either way, I was ambitious at first and thought I could teach him sign language, but that proved rather difficult. I think he’s learned that when I sign an “S” into his hand, it’s me who is handling him, and maybe he understands that the “J” I sign represents him. I was working on yes and no, eat and toilet, but I’m not so sure those are going to sink it. He scratches really badly whenever anyone is in grabbing range, and I don’t really get to spend enough time with him to make that work. I also wonder how his mental condition affects his ability to learn.

Uzabaho is another of my favorites. This little guy is quite literally a little guy. I’m told that he’s probably 7 years old, but he looks like a baby. Like he’s maybe one year. Teresa, another volunteer here from Spain who has been here for 5 years said that he came in either 2 or 3 years ago and has only grown maybe a few inches since. I’ve combed the internet and cannot for the life of me figure out what he has. His body is very stiff, his legs cross and his fists are clenched, he has poor muscle tone, his face is normally sized, but his head is really large for his body—it looks like he has a big brain or something, and his head is really heavy. He also has the mental maturity of a baby as well, from what I can tell. Since he can’t move or sit up on his own, he spends his time either lying in a cot, lying on a mat on the ground, tied to a car seat, or in our arms. I love his smile though :) He’s ticklish and loves attention, so I try to interact with him when I can. It’s hard though when the CP kids are crying for something, Yvonna is stealing everyone’s toys, Innocent is hitting everyone (he by far has the most misleading name), and someone just peed on the floor…

So that’s work in a nutshell. Also, this dude with the most epic dreads just walked past me. Gotta love what I’ll assume is the only hookah bar in Kigali :) 

Update: So, I wrote this like 8 days ago. Just thought that I’d also add that the other day at the orphanage, it was the Annunciation (Catholic thing), so we had a party for two of the sisters whose religious names somehow related to the day. In true Rwandan style, it was full of dancing, drumming, and small children running everywhere. Some of the older disabled girls did a traditional Rwandan dance for us first. Some of them were actually pretty good! There’s this one girl, Mwiza (her name is actually something-mwiza, but I’m not entirely sure what, so I just call her mwiza, which means beautiful) who is the one that comes up and holds my hand and gives me a hug even when I’m walking the younger kids around. She was so happy, and even though she couldn’t get the steps and turns quite right, she thoroughly enjoyed stomping around with her hands in the air and smiling :) 

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Sad stories


I guess I’m just in a sad mood today. Maybe it’s the small children withdrawal—they don’t take volunteers on Thursdays, so here I am, sitting at home on the balcony looking out over our front yard and driveway (and one of our helpers sweeping the driveway with the brush part of a broom—not that there are handled brooms here anyway, that’s just the easiest way to describe it. This city is crazy clean. And this black bird with a fro and a bright orange tail :) )and the city beyond that since we’re essentially at the top of a hill. It’s a pretty grey day, yet it still manages to be bright as all get out—yay for the equator! Anyway, there are a couple of stories that I realized I’d left out that I occasionally remember, so here you go…

So, when we were at the refugee settlement, we sat in the car for a while when we first got there. There was a mom and her two babies (anyone under 5 here is a baby) sitting in this pavilion-ish thing across the drive way. The kids came over to stare at us per usual, and so I got out of the car and sat down to see them. They were really dirty, especially their clothes.  We gave them a couple of biscuits (cookies) and bananas that we had on hand, and Issa, our teacher, was able to speak to them in Swahili, I think it was. We weren’t quite sure where their family was from, but then they told Issa that they wanted to go in our van. He asked them where they wanted to go, as a joke. They looked back at him and said, “back to Congo.” These poor kids probably had never been to Congo, and even if they had (if their family had come there recently), they likely didn’t remember it because they were so young. It sounded like they were parroting something they had heard their parents or siblings say. Life at a refugee settlement can’t be easy, but to prefer Congo over the settlement? That’s saying something.

There’s this girl at Abakarikuta who’s probably in her late teens or early twenties, it’s hard to say. She might have Down’s syndrome or something like that. She comes and hangs around the toddlers a lot, and one day while I was pushing some of the kids on the merry go round, she came into the playground, picked up a chopped piece of wood, put it on her hip like a baby, wrapped her sweater around herself and the wood, bent over and shifted the wood to her back, and tied off her sweater in front—tying her wood baby to her back like I guess she’s seen mothers do. Like the baby she’ll likely not ever have.

Speaking of moms and babies, there’s this mom and her baby who sit by the steps that I go up every day to get from Abakarikuta to town. Every time I pass, the mother always asks for money. I can’t tell a professional beggar from someone who is legitimately poor, but if I had to guess, I’d say they’re the latter. We’ve been taught not to give to people like this, but it’s so hard to see them sit there every day.

And speaking of begging, there are a fair amount of beggars in town. There are the kids that swarm you occasionally when you leave UTC (the mall), there’s the 3 year old girl that grabs your hand and walks with you while telling you she’s hungry, and then there are the adults who are apparently disabled. I say apparently because I’m not entirely sure if they’re legitimate or not. Is her back really that disfigured, or is she just leaning over like that to make it seem that way? Are his legs really that deformed, or is he just contorting them to look like that?  It’s interesting. Part of my research for my internship paper will definitely be about what sort of services are available for the poor and disabled in Kigali and in Rwanda, because I honestly have no idea what alternatives disabled people have to begging.

Another thing that’s tricky is asking people how their families are. According to my Kinyarwanda book, that’s just a polite thing to do, but with people here, it inevitably brings up genocide. I asked our guide at TIG how his family was (out of a lack of anything else to say), and he told me he was single, which I took to mean he wasn’t married. I clarified by saying mama, papa, abavandimwe (siblings), and he said no, we are only two—me and my brother. Everyone else died in the genocide. What can you say to that, really? Sorry doesn’t even begin to cut it, but it’s worth a shot.

There’s also this really tragic story about what happened to a lady and her baby during the genocide that comes back to haunt me every once in a while, but that’s a little more graphic than I ought to say here.

But hey, here’s a more humorous story for you—I’ve been told that I’m beautiful, that I’m hot, that I’m nice to look at, etc. more here than I ever have been (except by Marvin, le duh. I love you :) ), and I’ve also gotten more numbers than I know what to do with (again, love you!). Maybe I could wallpaper my room with them…

Rwanda is quite an experience.

Criticizing Mother Teresa


I’ve also been reading up on critiques of Mother Teresa and the Missionaries of Charity—yes, it is possible to criticize Mother Teresa. I know, I cringed at the idea at first too, but then I kept reading. And the material is in no short supply either. It’s interesting. Most of the critiques center on medical neglect and financial mismanagement/a lack of financial transparency. Most of the articles/books I found also seem to center on her homes in India, Calcutta in particular. In terms of medical neglect, I found claims that needles were washed in cold water and reused until they were dull and hurt the patient/residents (which all of the articles referred to as “inmates,” even ascribing that name to the words of the sisters themselves), that untrained volunteers were administering medical care that they weren’t qualified to do, that the sisters didn’t distinguish between curable and incurable illnesses and let patients who could have been cured die, and that the sisters glorified suffering not just for themselves but also for their patients. One story I found (that I probably ought to research the validity of) told that Mother Teresa was once with a patient who was screaming in agony. She told him that he was sharing in the suffering of Jesus and that “Jesus is kissing you,” to which he replied, “Then tell your Jesus to stop kissing me!” At best, it makes for an interesting story, at worst, it makes for an awful reality. Apparently they don’t use painkillers. I’ve read, however, that when the sisters are sick, Mother Teresa in particular, they are taken to the best doctors and specialists. The financial mismanagement/lack of financial transparency is related to the medical neglect. They don’t accept money from the government or the church. They don’t fundraise because “God provides.” Apparently even canning tomatoes after receiving an excessive donation showed a lack of trust in divine providence. The Missionaries of Charity don’t keep financial records but are assumed to be the wealthiest congregation in the Catholic church (as per estimates by those who have left the congregation). However, it appears that the massive donations they’ve received haven’t gone towards improving living conditions or patient welfare practices in the existing homes, but rather they have gone toward flying Mother Teresa around in a private jet, opening new convents and homes, and simply sitting in their bank accounts, as one former sister said. They also apparently reject any donations of new materials or new technology such as new needles offered by a group of volunteers or washing machines offered by the same. One article made a good point that with the reputation that Mother Teresa had, medical groups, non-profits, charities, etc. would jump at the chance to be able to provide modern medical care and other materials and services to her organization, but she never asked for it, and better yet, she (and her organization) refused these things when they were offered. The world has gained a lot by the suffering of the poor, Mother Teresa said once. I can definitely understand this in a capitalistic sense—that the rest of the world has profited much from the labor and money of the poor. But Mother Teresa meant that in the eyes of God, the world has benefited from the suffering of the poor because God loves suffering, in her eyes. I’m not really sure what to make of all this.

On the other hand, this doesn’t all match what I’ve seen at Abakarikuta. Yes, the facilities are simple, but they’re clean—washed at least once a day, and I’m sure it’s more when I’m not there. There’s a group working to get the kids custom fit wheel chairs, and they didn’t mention any resistance from the sisters. There’s a physical therapist that comes in three times a week and provides them with therapy that, according to a pediatrician friend of another volunteer, is very good for the resources they have and employs modern practices. I also haven’t seen any horrendously sick people or reused needles, but I’ve also only been with healthy kids, and I don’t think this is a home for the dying—notwithstanding the elderly people there, but even they seem healthy. Everyone seems well fed too, so I don’t know what to think just yet. Maybe it’s just India that has all or most of the problems. Maybe I just can’t see the problems here yet. The only thing I’ve noticed is that, from what I’ve seen in my limited 3 days of work, there doesn’t seem to be a goal-oriented or progress-oriented mindset here. Everything is just maintenance of the status quo. Maybe that’s all they have the time/man-power for. Maybe that’s symptomatic of the Missionaries of Charity mindset. I don’t know.  I’ll keep reading, I guess, and learning about this organization first and second hand and see where that gets me. 

Thank God for Quick-Dry Pants


So, day 2 of my internship! And 3 while I’m at it. I learned how to put on the kids’ leg braces on Tuesday, which is actually pretty hard. Walking them around is so much fun though :) I also learned how to change their diapers. I've been changing diapers since probably about 6th or 7th grade, but this was a bit different. I guess because of the sheer number of kids, they use these small rectangular or square blankets, fold the top into a triangle, lay that over the front, tuck the rest of it behind, bring the corners around, tie them off well, and tuck the triangle around the knot. No rubber pants or liner or whatever that’s called though. Whenever the kids go to the bathroom, it leaks onto their pants. You usually discover that they need to be changed the hard way—picking them up or feeling a damp spot appear on your lap :P Hence thank god for quick-dry pants—Mom, I am getting some good use out of these things. They’re also helpful for when you accidently sit in a puddle of what I’ll assume was water. The morning routine was pretty much the same as it was Monday, and I feel like it’s going to be the same way every day. Life at the orphanage just seems to be a life of maintenance and survival—feed and change the kids, exercise them (not exorcize, though this is a Catholic place), change them, tend to them when they cry, play, repeat. I’m sure they sleep somewhere in there too. It seems like simply keeping these kids alive and well is all the sisters and workers have time for. At least the workers. I don’t see the sisters too often. Maybe a couple of times a day. They’re in and out. I’m not sure what they do, but I’m sure I’ll find out eventually. There just seems like there’s so much need here—so many kids with disabilities that could probably be much better off and given better therapy were they adopted, so many babies screaming and crying (and volunteers aren't allowed to be with the babies because the babies get so used to being held that when the volunteers go home, they cry and the nuns are left to handle them on their own), so many kids that just need someone to hold them…I just wish they could all be adopted. But apparently the disabled ones aren't likely to be adopted, which is sad. If I could, there are two that I definitely have my eye on :) But apparently the Rwandan government (along with many other governments) is making international adoptions more difficult. To adopt a kid from Rwanda, you have to live in Rwanda for 3 years with the child.

Anyway, so the morning was about the same, as was the afternoon—more feeding, playing, and changing. It didn’t take long for me to feel like I’ve got the hang of things here. I haven’t entirely figured out how the whole place works, but I know they have a section for the toddlers, a section for the babies, a section for the older kids and adults, and a couple of older random able bodied kids running around—I know they have some that go to school up the road, but I don’t know the full story behind them. They also have a bunch of guys who chop wood there—I assume for cooking fuel—which the nuns handed out to people with cards from the neighborhood on Wednesday. They also have a sewing class/workshop up near the gate for women from the nearby villages, which I guess is there to teach them profitable skills. There are so many questions I have about this place that hopefully either the English speaking volunteers who have been here for a while or the nuns can answer for me. Eventually. I’m sure I’ll get this all figured out soon.

Also, I met two more volunteers—one from the US and one from…France, maybe? I forget. Either way, these are going to be some seriously multicultural babies. 

I don’t even know what language I speak anymore

So, I’ve officially been at my internship at Abakarikuta (Missionaries of Charity) for 3 days. I started at 8 am Monday morning, and it’s now Wednesday afternoon. It’s been interesting so far.

The organization allows “visitors” from 8-10am and 3-5pm every day except for Thursday and Sunday, so those are the hours I’m currently working. I have a meeting with the head sister when she gets back from Uganda to discuss a way to add hours to my work by doing a separate project to benefit the organization. This is supposed to be my internship, so I don’t really like being considered a visitor. Volunteer would be fine since that’s basically what I’m doing right now, but I guess that’s just the term they use.

Monday morning was interesting. I arrived at Abakarikuta at about 8 and went down to the toddler’s room. The workers (I don’t really know what to call them. They’re not sisters, but they work there regularly and they’re Rwandan, so maybe they’re volunteers? I don’t know. They also don’t leave after visitor hours, so I don’t know.) and another volunteer had brought them outside for some fresh air and to put the leg braces on those that need them. There are about 20 kids aged maybe 2-5 with varying levels of ability. Some are completely able-bodied and minded. Some are mentally fine but physically disabled, and some are both mentally and physically disabled. One is blind as well. They are mostly boys with a small handful of girls. I wasn’t entirely sure what to do for the first day, so I mostly just played with the kids and watched the other workers and volunteer. The other volunteer approached me and asked if I spoke French. I told her no and asked if she spoke English, which she didn’t. We each spoke a little Kinyarwanda, but that didn’t get us far. A little while later I asked her if she spoke Spanish, on the off chance that I could actually use that language here, and she did! She speaks Spain Spanish though, and she speaks it much better than I do, so I don’t always catch everything she says, but we can communicate a lot more than I can with the Rwandan workers. She taught me how to walk the kids with leg braces—I promise they’re not on leashes, there’s just not a better way to put that. For most of them, you stand behind them, hold their hands, and urge them forward or help them move their legs to walk forward. Some of them can walk pretty well, but some of them can’t at all. For one of the bigger kids, you have to loop blankets through his leg braces and pull his legs forward with the blankets to help them walk.

 As we were doing that, a group of Muzungus arrived. A few of them were regular volunteers who usually come on Wednesdays, they told me, and the others were friends of theirs who were in town from Oklahoma! I talked with them for a bit, and then we took the kids to go play on the playground. There’s this merry go round thing that they absolutely loved, so we pushed them on there for a bit and pushed some on the swings, and then they brought out little suckers for the kids. One of the guys asked me why I was there, and I explained that I’m doing an internship as a part of my program and that I love working with kids. He then asked me if I was Christian. I told him I wasn’t, and he looked at me oddly. I told him that I was a Unitarian Universalist, and he thought that since this was a Catholic group with Mother Teresa that did such good things I must be Christian. I told him nope! I secretly wish I could have told him that nope, non-Christians can be good people and do good things too! Imagine that! The missionary types here are *really* interesting. Anyway, they soon left, and it was time to bring the kids inside for lunch (I guess it was).

We brought them inside and sat them in the middle of the floor—well, the ones who couldn’t walk anyway. The ones who can walk are basically on their own here. Since they don’t need as much attention as the disabled kids do, they can run around and play, climb on things, climb on us, walk on tables, whatever and only get yelled at occasionally. They’re definitely independent. Unless they want you to hold them. Which they do. All the time. Anyway, we brought the kids in and the workers brought in giant bowls of rice and vegetables. They dished out the food into little plates for the kids, sat the able ones down at a table to eat on their own, and then we each took a kid and fed them. It’s kind of an art form. You sit them down in these little plastic chairs, sit across from then in another chair, tap them with the spoon on their bottom lip to get them to open up, put the spoon in their mouth, and then use their top lip to scrape the food off into their mouth. One kid at a time until they’re all fed. It’s probably the calmest time of the morning since they’re all occupied, but it’s also the messiest. By the end of it, there’s rice on the floor, on their shirts, up their nose (you think I’m kidding), etc. But they’re fed and happy :) By the time we finished, Teresa, the lady from France, told me that it was well past time to leave—10:40 almost. I had completely lost track of time. I headed out and went back to Kacyiru (where SIT is. My internship is in Muhima, which is right next to downtown) to have lunch with some of the other students.

I went back to Abakarikuta that afternoon at 3 and raced the rain to the gate. Seeing the rain and lightning move over the hills here is pretty cool. The kids were in the same room when I got back, and it was time for another round of feedings—this time banana, bread, milk mash. Seemed tasty enough. Messy as well. After snack time, it was play time, which basically consists of bouncing kids up and down on my legs and singing frère jaques/the English version of that/the Spanish greeting song to that tune/a Kinyarwanda of the greeting song that I made up. Oh, and the Noble Duke of York. They love that too. One of the workers also turned on the radio for a bit, so it was dance time as well :) Dinner time rolled around, and of course I lost track of time again. One of the sisters had to come tell me I’d overstayed again by 40 minutes! Oops.

Oh, the title of this post. Basically, I don’t even know what language I speak anymore. If I’m just talking to myself, it comes out as a Kinyarwanda-Spanish-English hybrid. If I’m talking to a Rwandan, it’s either broken Kinyarwanda or simple English. I read an article once about Simple English being the lingua franca of the EU or something like that. Even those who spoke English natively had to learn this new type of English because they had to speak so differently than they were used to. That’s basically how I feel here. A common joke among the SIT students is that we don’t even speak English any more. We’ll try to form a sentence and it just comes out so mixed up and backwards or grammatically incorrect that it hardly makes sense. Or we’ll just forget words all together. Speaking of which, apparently I’ve forgotten so much more Spanish than I thought. The Spanish I speak to Teresa is a Spanish-Kinyarwanda hybrid. Also, I’ve had to pick up a little French out of necessity—prices, days of the week, greetings, etc. just because that’s the older generation’s first second language (if that makes any sense) and that’s what they assume you speak. Basically, I don’t even know what language I speak anymore. But it’s really funny to start speaking random languages to confuse the hell out of my siblings :)

Au revoir, inshuti
Good bye, ami
Urabeho, amigo
Adios, friend :)